Gods hidden agenda

I had a recent medical scare that I have been debating on blogging about, not because of me but to share the uncommon ways God can use us.

About 3 months ago I had a really sore lymph node come up under my left arm.  I had recently had a sinus issues so I chalked it up to my body fighting off that virus.  Needless to say it continued to stay sore and at times throb.  I tried to put it out of my mind thinking it was all in my head but being in the medical field the worst always came to mind.  I finally gave in and decided to have it checked out, especially since my deductible had been met for the year.  She felt it and said she wanted to have it ultrasounded.  Of course all kinds of thoughts flooded my mind.  I kept repeating scripture in my head to try to control my emotions.  The ones I thought of the most were; "I did not give you a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and of a sound mind. 2 Tim 1:7" and "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:10-12 "

I dreaded the next days anticipating the worst but hoping for the best.  I took a lot of my fear and turned it into frustration, wrongfully attacking Chris.  Finally the night before I was sitting on the couch looking at the Christmas tree and said, "Lord I submit to your perfect will."  I felt a immense feeling of peace come over me. I knew regardless, everything was going to be okay.  I told God that whoever I met the next day during my ultrasound I would tell them about Him.

Chris went with me to the appointment after dropping the kids off.  I was called back by a young lady in her late 30's. She introduced herself and began asking questions about the lump. Somehow we got on the topic of what I did for a living and told her I was a physical therapist but now only worked PRN so I could stay at home and homeschool my children.  She was intrigued and stated she had wanted to homeschool her son but came down with a very deadly and aggressive cancer that took up a lot of her life.  She asked why I homeschool and I proceeded to tell her that my husband and I are Christians and that we want to develop the character of Christ in our children in all we do even in their education.  She lit up and said I am a christian too.  We talked about God and our child rearing beliefs for the next 45 minutes as she scanned my underarm and chest. I was at peace the whole time.

She finished and said that she would have the doctor read it before I left so that I could have some peace.  She returned with the report that all was normal.  I have 2 lymph nodes that are sore and most likely related to nursing.  My heart leaped for joy with the good news.  She told me to put my clothes on and then knock on the door to let her know I was done.  I was so moved by her that I just had to tell her what had transpired over the past few days and that I felt God put her there for me on this day. 

When she came back I proceeded to tell her how thankful I was for her and how I felt that God placed her there at her job on this day to provide me comfort.  She began to fight back tears and say that she had not felt the presence of God in a long time and thoughout our interaction she kept feeling Him touch her.  We both were fighting back tears and just reached out and began hugging one another.  She told me how she had a PET scan the week before and came to grips that if it was her time she was ready.  It all came back clear.  We praised God, the great physician, together.  I think we hugged 3 times before I left and she gave me her cell phone number.

I am still at awe of how mighty God is and how He works.  Was she there for me or was I there for her?  If I had not submitted to God and his leading me to speak of Him would she have experienced His presence that she so desperately needed? 

Being an instrument of God is not always fun and smiles.  He can use the most fearful moment of your life to not only touch you but to use you to touch someone else.  I am learning to listen a little more intently to God and His perfect will.  I am so thankful I did.  I was blessed beyond measure.