His Grace is Sufficient

I have been on a bit of a roller-coaster these past few weeks.  So I have been far from distracted to blog. Sorry.

I found out I was pregnant  on May 14.  We had not planned on trying until August but I guess Destin got the best of both of us.  Yes Bridget, you were right. I started having right sided pain so the OB wanted to do an ultrasound to make sure it was not ectopic.  None was visualized but wanted to do a follow up ultrasound in one week to recheck everything.  So I went back on May 25.  Repeat ultrasound showed a 5 week and 1 day embryo baby and according to my last period it should have been 6 weeks and one day.  The doc said only 25% of these pregnancies last and wanted to recheck again in one week to see if there was a heartbeat. If not then he wanted to schedule me for a D&C. I told him I had recently quit nursing and that my cycles were not textbook. He offered me a little more hope.  I had been through this before I had Makenna.  I lost a 9 week old pregnancy with a baby that had not survived 5 weeks gestation.  All those old feelings came rushing back and Chris was quick to hold me tight.  I told the doc that we would just have to put it in God's hands and he reassuringly said it always is anyways.

We spent the last week praying that not my will but His will be done.  That God and God alone knew what was best for this little angel and that we trusted whatever decision he made.  Deep down inside I really did not want to travel down that road again.  It was a very painful experience but it allowed me to minister to other girls who had miscarriages after I did. I was able to help them heal though my pain.  So I knew even in my sorrow God was glorified. Romans 8:28 still rings clear, "All things work together for the good of those who are the called according to his purpose."

Yesterday Chris and I went to the appointment with trust in our hearts.  The Ultrasound showed a heartbeat and a baby exactly one week older than last.  Thank you Jesus was all I could say.  Then I told the doc I would jump up and hug him if I had clothes on.  He chuckled.  The only answer is that my ovulation is off due to the nursing and that I am 6 weeks and some change.  That made Chris a little more happy because when I told him I was pregnant and how far along I thought I was he said, "How did that happen?"  With the new tracking via the ultrasound he knew how it happened.

So now we are just praising God for his love and power on top of feeling the common ailments of the first trimester.  I have barely made it off the couch for the past week.  Chris has been playing Mr. Mom but reminds me, "Honey I am not cut out for this." And I think he was secretly glad to go back to work. I am slowly doing better with my 2 new best friends on board. Phenagren and Zofran. Love them!!!!

We have a few added stresses though. Maddax caught strep last week and it has progressed in to diarrhea and a low grade temp.  And if that were not enough Makenna has been sick since Sunday with a cold/allergy ordeal that leaves her coughing and snotting.  I think God is just upping  my patience to prepare me for number three to arrive Jan 23, 2011.

I am so thankful that God will never leave us or forsake us because right now He is my sanity!!!

Through this whole process I kept hearing the words to the song, "His grace is sufficient for me. His strength is made perfect when I am weak. All that I cling to I lay at his feet. His grace is sufficient for me."